Split Open

Photo By: Carrie

Arcata Community Forest, Arcata CA

Here I am
Hesitating there are too many
Words circling, it feels quite odd
Being split in two

There are so many times
I don’t know what to do, I am happy
Awed everyday at the beauty
This wild place, the more I explore

I want to stay
To touch to feel to let
The rains wash away
My life fears

Cozy up with a warm cup of tea
Feel my new couch
Get warm beneath my seat
And yet, there is a hitch

A hesitant voice telling me don’t
Get too close, I can’t
Have it both ways, the freedom
To be without seeing

The ugliness
For we all know
There is a ying to every yang
In this case it is heartbreaking

Drugs growing
In the hills, seeping
Into the towns spreading
Smokey undercurrent easily detected

Hardly any law enforcement, do I trust
My hearts longing
Soak up the endless natural surprises
Trust that my boys have

A solid foundation
Do I feed my motherly fears
Protect my young and move
Again uprooting

I am not
Ready to decide
What to do

**It is monochrome madness time again, this is my entry for this week. Laura Mackey and Leanne Cole bring together a wonderful collection each week. You can find their entries as well as many others HERE.


    1. Hi Robyn, thank you for your comments and I’ll take the hug too. Yes, this is me, right now. We moved over the summer as you know, we were aware of the “pot cloud” hanging over this area but had no idea how big the problem is. Since we are not users we thought innocently enough, it wouldn’t affect us. But, what we now are seeing is this is the hub of the U.S. in terms of growing pot, crazy! And, with all the talk of legalization in California, sooner rather than later, this is a place where that change will greatly impact things probably in a crazy bad way to begin with before it gets good. I am so sad about it, I love so much about this area but I am seeing there is more to the vast beauty, it allows people to get lost, under the radar, and that is a great way to participate in illegal growing. I have learned too much about growing pot since moving here! In my heart, I know I will figure out what is best, at this moment, there isn’t an alternative that has presented itself…soon perhaps.

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